I guess in my thinking of Trent and how our life would change with dementia, I thought it would still have Trent watching football on the weekends or following the Dallas Cowboys. He can't attend and hang on to that short term memory to remember what was going on before the last commercial. Everything on TV is over when the commercial comes on. This past weekend he didn't know his precious Cowboys were football players rather than men riding the prairie on horses.
Trent's focus is the dogs,Cookie in particular. He stalks her from room to room and may cry when she won't come to him. I think Cookie is now paranoid as she backs her ears and tries to get away and hide. I, on the other hand, am jealous and hurt that I don't get any of the attention. Somehow I still expect that he might somehow know that I make his life easier and try to know that I've done everything I could, that he's taken every pill and made every doctor appointment. I've tried to be open to advice from any one who has an idea. Yet, I can't get off high center to look for a nursing home for the future and I seem to spend many nights worrying how I will pay for what he needs.
I made some calls this afternoon to get some morning help on 2 days a week so I could get to work on time and not worry what will happen before the bus arrives. The minimum shift that they will work is 3 hours. I need about an hour and a half. They would charge me $16.50 an hour, but would charge me for 3 hours (minimum shift). I would pay $400 dollars a month to have someone watch him so that I could go make $278. That makes no sense but I need that $278 to help with the $900 a month for his daycare. I obviously don't have correct equation yet. How many hours can you impose on your friends at 7:30 in the morning?
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